Contrary to society’s belief, God is not Santa. His birth was on Christmas day, and so many may associate that with the “Santa” persona, but God is much more than one who checks the list to see if we are good or not. He is not dependent on what we do or don’t do, He is constant, and never changes. During this season, I have been waiting for God to fulfill a promise, that is very dear to me, and waiting for it has been hard, especially because it is not on my timeline. I’ve been basing God’s movement on when I think he should move, and how I think He will move, and I end up disappointing myself. This disappointment often forms into anger towards Him, even though it was all my doing. So I end up mad at God, for something I thought He should do. Does this sound familiar, and even how you may treat others in your life?

Navigating through disappointment is one thing I am learning, and it requires stripping off what we think we know and relearning what is truth and who God is. God doesn’t need help in being who He is, or doing what He does. Yet, in our minds, we think we can help God and give him instructions on how we think the plan should go, But He already has it written. So, I’m believing for this promise, and I’ll believe, God will do it this way or this week, and He doesn’t, and I would become so disappointed, saying to myself, but I believed, I fasted, I did what you asked, and I haven’t done wrong, trying to defend my case against God when there’s no need. After reading the book of Job, I was humbled, and I saw how Job a man who was upright before the Lord, lost everything and did the same complaining and defense towards God. He was trying to defend himself, and understand why things were happening like this to himself. Elihu helps to talk some sense into Job,

35 ^1-3 Elihu lit into Job again:

“Does this kind of thing make any sense?
    First you say, ‘I’m perfectly innocent before God.’
And then you say, ‘It doesn’t make a bit of difference
    whether I’ve sinned or not.’

^4-8 “Well, I’m going to show you
    that you don’t know what you’re talking about,
    neither you nor your friends.
Look up at the sky. Take a long hard look.
    See those clouds towering above you?
If you sin, what difference could that make to God?
    No matter how much you sin, will it matter to him?
Even if you’re good, what would God get out of that?
    Do you think he’s dependent on your accomplishments?
The only ones who care whether you’re good or bad
    are your family and friends and neighbors.
    God’s not dependent on your behavior.

^9-15 “When times get bad, people cry out for help.
    They cry for relief from being kicked around,
But never give God a thought when things go well,
    when God puts spontaneous songs in their hearts,
When God sets out the entire creation as a science classroom,
    using birds and beasts to teach wisdom.
People are arrogantly indifferent to God—
    until, of course, they’re in trouble,
    and then God is indifferent to them.
There’s nothing behind such prayers except panic;
    the Almighty pays them no mind.
So why would he notice you
    just because you say you’re tired of waiting to be heard,
Or waiting for him to get good and angry
    and do something about the world’s problems?

¹⁶ “Job, you talk sheer nonsense—
    nonstop nonsense!”

Job 35 MSG

So after reading Job, and reflecting on the goodness of God, when thoughts like those arise, I can say, even if God does or doesn’t do what we think He should, He is still good. I used to think well He is not good, because He didn’t do what I wanted, and didn’t give me what I prayed for, but now I can say He is still good, because even when it is not my way, I can think of so many other reasons why He still remains good. God has written our plan and story, and He knows exactly what we need, and when things should happen. But we can only see part of the plan, and we have to be mindful and remember ” For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.” Isaiah 55:8. Keep your faith, talk to God about those thoughts and cares of yours, and don’t let them put division between you and God. You can come to God with anything, even if you’re angry, or disappointed.